Stop Apologizing! Now Say You Are Sorry…

I used to be the type of person who would apologize if someone stomped on my foot while walking past or knocked into me and spilled my drink.

I’m still sometimes that person. I almost started this blog apologizing for not writing sooner. (I’m so sorry I haven’t been blogging, I’ve been busy teaching, writing a new book, and having a really great time with my friends…)

Can you relate?

Apologizing for our very existence seems to be hard-wired into most women at a pretty early age. Not too hard to understand when the predominant religious myth of our culture squarely puts the blame on a woman for being the cause of casting the entirety of all future human generations out of paradise. Whoops. It’s as if we have been apologizing ever since.

So I deem this upcoming week the “Warrior Goddess Unconscious / Conscious Apology Experiment,” AKA Project I Can Take Up Space.

Here’s how to change the apologizing for everything habit.

Part one: Track where you apologize unconsciously at work, home, with strangers. Be curious. Where do you say your sorry without even realizing it? Here are two great articles from writer Gabrielle Moss to prime your no-apology pump.

The No Apology Week: 23 Things Not to Apologize for

Now tell the Warrior Goddess Tribe about it!
Our wondrously glorious Warrior Goddess team just created a new Facebook Group so we can share with each other. It’s getting personal in the most beautiful way. Join in and tell us how you are doing so we can celebrate with you or offer support and love…

Join the Warrior Goddess Tribe on Facebook

6 thoughts on “Stop Apologizing! Now Say You Are Sorry…

  1. I’ve quit apologizing for missing someone’s call or not answering when they called. I just return the call and say “hi” i’m Glad you called me. Also, in those moments where I’m feeling apologetic for being “me”, I try to remeber to say instead “thank you for being patient with me while I…”. Usually we are judging ourselves for something the other person doesn’t even see. So thanking them is a way of honoring ourselves and honoring their love for us. Also, as a way of reinforcing it for myself and helping the people in my life, I try to gently not accept their apologies when they are apologizing for being themselves.

  2. I have stopped apologizing in my emails. Back in July I decided to work from home and now I realize how much I apologize to my partner about the household chores. I think it’s mainly about my own guilt in just not feeling motivated to keep up with them.

  3. My husband passed away suddenly just over 4 months ago. He was my soulmate and best friend. Nothing unusual; we went to sleep and the next morning I woke up and he was gone. Recently I have found myself apologizing to people for still grieving so profoundly. “Friends” have been slowly backing away because they do not understand the depth of my grief. In some ways I feel sorry for them. I know enjoying a deep and profound love will result in a deep and profound grief. Other people have become special friends as they have supported and embraced me during this part of my life journey. They fully understand. I will no longer apologize for my grief as it means I’m apologizing for our deep love. Thank you!

    1. I so agree, Barbara…. deep love means deep grief, which is a beauty all its own. I’m glad you are not apologizing, and being with the grief as you honor and bless your relationship with your husband. May you find friends that can hold you through your grieving; you are seen. Much love.

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